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172 Even So, I Don't Mind
"It's my fault, all my fault... I'm sorry..."
As Ortansia continued to apologise over and over, GĂ©rard's fingertips gently touched her cheek.
"...Don't cry."
Surprised, she looked up to meet the gaze of GĂ©rard, who was looking straight at her.
Sensing definite warmth in the depths of those eyes, Ortansia's breath involuntarily hitched.
"When you cry, I don't know what to do."
Coincidentally, these were the same words the GĂ©rard from the original world had once said to her.
"Every time I see you crying, my heart is thrown into turmoil. ...You're the only one. The only one who affects me this way."
GĂ©rard's hand moved from her cheek to her shoulder, then round to her back, slowly drawing her close.
At the warm body heat she felt, and the strength of the arms embracing her, Ortansia's heartbeat quickened.
...This isn't right.
Though alarm bells were ringing somewhere in her head, she couldn't pull away. She didn't want to pull away.
The person before her was GĂ©rard. In the original world, her stepbrother GĂ©rard.
...That's why she'd deliberately tried not to think of him in that way.
Even though they weren't related by blood, they wanted to be close siblings.
For Ortansia, it was to survive, and for Gerard, it was to fill the void in his heart.
That's how they had drawn close to rely on each other.
Whenever she sensed the possibility that he might one day take the hand of a woman other than Ortansia, somewhere in her heart there was a creaking sound.
Yet she had always pretended not to notice.
Because if they weren't family, if they weren't siblings, there would be no way for Ortansia to remain by his side.
She mustn't notice it. She mustn't cross that line.
Surely unconsciously, she had disciplined herself this way
If they could have continued living peacefully in the original world, that would have been enough.
But Ortansia had changed fate with her own hands.
The GĂ©rard here now had no blood connection to Ortansia, no memories of being raised as siblings.
Even so, when he found Ortansia crying alone. He had reached out to her.
If someone showed her such kindness when she was vulnerable... she could no longer lie to her own heart.
‘I... this person…’
Just as Ortansia thought this, GĂ©rard whispered slowly.
"I'm attracted to you."
He spoke in a voice that was gentle and enveloping, yet exuded a definite passion.
"When you're near, I can't help but follow you with my eyes. When you're far away, I can't stop worrying about whether you're crying again, whether you're hurt. ...I've never felt this way before."
GĂ©rard's words made her chest burn.
Strangely, she felt no aversion or confusion.
"I've never felt such emotions towards anyone else before. But I understood immediately. That this is... the emotion called love."
The moment those words reached her ears, Ortansia couldn't bear it and wrapped both arms round GĂ©rard's back.
Truly, Ortansia too, all this time…
She hadn't known until now that loving and being loved could bring such deep happiness.
GĂ©rard drew in a surprised breath for a moment, but immediately embraced Ortansia tightly in return.
"... Ortansia."
Each time he called her name in his voice, a light kindled in her chest.
Emotions she couldn't suppress threatened to overflow, making her cling to him even more tightly.
"Noble or servant, such things don't matter. I want you."
He released Ortansia's body at once, then told her whilst gazing at each other at close range.
"From now on, no matter what happens, I will definitely protect you. So... become my wife, Ortansia."
"!?"
Her heart, which had been as if floating with fever, was suddenly pulled back to reality.
GĂ©rard had said to become his wife. In other words, to marry him, and these were unmistakably words of proposal...
‘Wh-what should I do...!’
This wasn't a time to be carried away just because the person she loved had spoken words of love.
GĂ©rard was an honest person.
That's precisely why he had made this promise about the future, so as not to worry Ortansia.
But unlike when he had simply declared his love, Ortansia couldn't honestly accept this offer.
‘Right now I'm just a servant. To become the wife of Master GĂ©rard, heir to the VĂ©ritĂ© ducal house…’
Such a thing could never be permitted.
Marguerite, of course, and the Duke and Duchess would never accept it either.
...Once again, the peace and happiness of the Vérité ducal family would be destroyed because of Ortansia.
"Ortansia."
GĂ©rard peered worriedly at Ortansia's face, which had suddenly paled.
Ortansia timidly gazed back at the young man before her.
Those beautiful eyes gazing at her.
Those warm hands that gently stroked her head and embraced her.
Most of all, that heart that seemed cold but was kind... she'd realised she loved it.
Even so, when she gazed at him like this, she couldn't help but remember the other "GĂ©rard."
‘Brother…’
Was the person before her the very same person as Ortansia's stepbrother who had followed a different fate?
Or, as she had heard that voice calling, was GĂ©rard her stepbrother somewhere else currently?
...Which "GĂ©rard" was she truly attracted to?
Ortansia suddenly no longer knew.
Staring at Ortansia, who lowered her gaze in confusion, GĂ©rard murmured a little sadly.
"...So you really are looking at someone else through me."
"Master GĂ©rard! That's…"
"But even so, I don't mind."
GĂ©rard declared this clearly, and Ortansia's breath involuntarily hitched.
"I don't know who you're looking at through me, but I will definitely... surpass that person."
GĂ©rard declared this in a voice tinged with definite determination.
He touched Ortansia's shoulder and whispered at close distance.
"So... choose me, Ortansia."
She felt as if she might be captured by that voice, by the intensity of that gaze.
Just as Ortansia opened her mouth, not knowing what she would say…
…With a bang, the room's door was flung open forcefully.
"...!"
Reflexively looking that way, Ortansia gasped.
Beyond the door stood Marguerite, her face filled with fury.
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