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"What do you think is the difference between love and like?"
Takumi nibbled on a rice cracker in front of me as I sat on my seat, saying, "Why suddenly?"
By the time I parted from Walnut, the rain had completely stopped.
We were about to stop by somewhere for dinner when she received a call from her mother on her phone. I didn't ask her what it was about, but she said she had to go home soon. I saw her off at the bus stop and bade her. From there, I waited for Takumi's errands to end and went over to his house.
"I'm asking seriously in anticipation of Takumi, who has extensive experience in love. Takumi said Rizakura is special, but if it's love or like, which is it?"
I lean forward to ask, but Takumi nibbles on another cracker while pulling a comic book off the shelf and opening it. Perhaps he thinks that he's had enough of my talks.
"By the way, no "special" answers, okay? I'll give you two choices: love or like!"
I took up the basketball manga Takumi was reading, cleared my throat, straightened my posture, and urged Takumi to sit up straight as well.
In hindsight, Takumi was a really nice guy who reluctantly answered my junior high school-like question. He was still seated cross-legged on his seat, though.
"I've never thought about it."
"Then think about it now. What do you think? Love? Like?"
"What about you? What do you think about Walnut?"
I was at a loss for words when the question came straight to me. It was because the question was so direct that it hit exactly what I really wanted to know.
I think she's cute. I find it endearing, and I wish she would smile. I enjoy being with her and want to see more of her expressions.
I've been vague about whether these are feelings as a friend or romantic feelings. But I think I've reached the limit of my ambiguity. I wanted to clarify the true nature of my feelings.
"It's a simple thing."
After listening to my explanation, Takumi laughed lightly. At times like this, I feel that Takumi has a reasonable experience in love after all. Perhaps you can't understand something like this until you've actually been through it.
"You don't want to give it to anyone else, but what you want to have contact with, that's the feeling of love."
According to Takumi, specific contact is one of the major keys to whether or not a romantic relationship will occur.
"You say Rio is beautiful, and you like her as a person, too, don't you? But do you want to hold hands with her?"
He answers two of my questions by pulling his chin back and the last one with a shake of his head.
"Rizakura is a dear friend and an irreplaceable companion. I think she is beautiful and I trust her, but I don't want to hold her hand. In fact, I had never imagined such a thing.
Then what about Walnuts?"
Takumi's gaze seems to see right through me. I felt a surge of embarrassment. The heat concentrated on my face.
Warm, small, Walnut's hands. Her long fingers and shapely fingernails, pale pink like coral, had the suppleness of a girl's hands.
The feeling of her hand against mine comes back to me in a very real way. The back of my right hand which she had touched felt unusually hot, and I let out a deep breath.
...this is nothing but "love" no matter how I think about it.
The emotions that I had not been able to identify now had a clear outline. Also, my mind seemed to become clearer.
"It's easy, isn't it?"
Takumi laughed and picked up the manga again. This time, I did not take it away from him, but nibbled on a rice cracker to hide my embarrassment.
After all, Takumi is a love expert. He was able to answer me with a simple criterion, something that I had been groaning and groaning about for a long time and couldn't figure out.
But then the genuine question arises in my head.
"Takumi, you touch girls a lot, don't you?"
"There's a way to say it. I just have a lot of skinship. It's the same thing."
I'm not sure what to expect, but I'm sure I'll be able to find something that will help. Read only at https://royaltywrites.com.ng/
Chuckling, I think back to Takumi's usual behavior. Quite often, he puts his hands on the shoulders of girls or pats the heads of those who come on to him.
Is he a prince in a shoujo manga? I thought he was a prince from a girl's manga, but in fact, Takumi does it without any unpleasantness.
"Do you want me to teach you some skinship tricks? I'll give you tips"
"No, that's not what I meant…"
The most important thing to remember is that the best way to get the most out of your time is to be prepared for the unexpected.
For example, Kurumi (Walnuts) and Rizakura once had leaves on their heads. When Takumi noticed it, he directly took it off Walnut's, whereas he told Rizakura only by word of mouth. Rizakura was having a hard time taking it off.
This seemed contrary and unnatural to my eyes.
"Is there another reason why you're stubbornly not trying to touch Rio?"
Takumi looked at me in surprise and chuckled, "You are very perceptive for a leaf."
I knew my feeling of discomfort wasn't just a figment of my imagination.
"In Rizakura's case, I guess so... It's not that I don't want to touch her, it's more like I'm not allowed to touch her."
"What's that?"
"No, I don't know either."
We looked at each other and laughed after a pause.
The actual fact is, I don't really understand what Takumi is talking about. However, while I want to touch Kurumi's hand again, I'm also afraid that if I do, something will break.
We boys at a sensitive age have complex feelings that words cannot explain.
"So, what are you going to do?"
"What do you mean, what are you going to do?"
"If you realize you like someone, what do you do after that? Confess…"
If the confession goes well, they should basically become lovers. If that happens, how nice would that be! But if I am rejected, what happens then? Will we be able to stay together like before? What about my relationship with Rizakura and Takumi? Will we be able to maintain a comfortable place where the four of us can spend time together?
"...Or rather, Walnut said that she is in unrequited love right now..."
How could I have forgotten something so important? My fluttery mind, as if doused with a bucket of water, is instantly drenched.
"The person she had a crush on might be Leaf," Takumi said and his words make my back straighten up.
"Well, it could also be someone else."
This time, my back collapses.
Takumi laughed out loud in an amused manner and then patted me on the shoulder. Read only at https://royaltywrites.com.ng/
"The first step is for you to realize your feelings. The rest is up to you to deal with at your own pace. If you are too conscious of your romantic feelings, things that had come naturally until then may not work out."
Takumi said so and revealed his white teeth. I wonder if he has ever had such an experience.
Takumi is a person who rarely denies anything he says or does. The same goes for Walnut and Rizakura. On the other hand, I tend to speculate with them, saying things like, "It would be nice if you did this," or "I wonder if it is actually like this."
I have learned to hold back from saying such things out loud.
As you can imagine, I've learned to be much more patient about saying things like, "I've got friends, I've got a girl I like, and I've got... It's like a drama, right?"
I opened the camera roll on my phone and looked at the photos the four of us took. Everyone has a nice expression on their face. They are trusting and having fun.
Even if I don't dare to change, I have Walnut by my side. Takumi is there, and Rizakura is there. If I wanted anything more, I would feel like I was being punished.
I let out a sigh of neither disappointment nor admiration toward the ceiling.
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